Ciao...

“A funny thing, a king that gets himself
Assassinated...”

It hurts, it stings, it is an unbearable betrayal, and yet I cannot wish you ill…for you were a Legend, and that carries with it certain qualities
The memories are eternal, the achievements can never be doubted, yet the memories have been stained by greed and lying, two traits you were never meant to posses, I cannot say you mean nothing, but you do.

“I am a dreamer but when I wake,
You can't break my spirit - it's my dreams you take.
And as you move on, remember”

I guess that really nothing is sacred in this life, everything can be bought, everything has a price, dignity, loyalty even love.
When though is the price too much? When does it cause you to lose respect, dignity, and love?

“A heart that's full up like a landfill,
a job that slowly kills you,
bruises that won't heal…
…with no alarms and no surprises,
no alarms and no surprises,
no alarms and no surprises,
Silent silence.”

R.I.P. Shevchenko 1999-2006

“You'll say, we've got nothing in common,
No common ground to start from,
And we're falling apart,
You'll say, the world has come between us,
Our lives have come between us,
Still I know you just don't care.”

Its raining outside, and I have slowly come to accept the rain, despite my objections to looking outside and seeing a gray sky I have come to terms with it at last.

“So you sailed away
Into a grey sky morning
Now I'm here to stay
Love can be so boring”

My toes are secured by a blanket that is keeping them warm, or so it feels when the reality is that my feet are cold, in not cold, yet still I feel my feet as being cold, and I think I’m about to sweat from them

“The key to staying, on top of things
is treat everything like it's your first project, know what im sayin?
Like it's your first day like back when you was an intern
Like, that's how you try to treat things like, just stay hungry”

Relaxing, no pressure, no hurry, no missions, just going at it, at my pace, enjoying every minute, treasuring every second, and never feeling like the day was a minute to long or that a moment was wasted

“Standing on a hill in my mountain of dreams,
Telling myself it's not as hard, hard, hard as it seems”

So here I am, back again, in many ways, in a new routine that strangely feels like nothing before it, or anything to follow it

“But I don't need no alibi - I'm a puppet on a string.
I just need this stage to be seen.
We all need a pantomime to remind us what is real.
Hold my eye and know what it means.”